Listen in and discover how to build a connection of openness, honesty and trust using Fearless Listening and Compassionate Communication to create Courageous Intimacy in your love life.

Discover the secrets to transforming your love life inside and outside the bedroom, both physical and emotional intimacy.

And the 5 intimacy destroying mistakes most couples make…

with passion, possibility and purpose,

Paul Sterling

PS. to get the study guide/handout go to

http://www.magicrelationship.net/study

PPS. to get a copy of my new ebook – STOP… In The Name Of Love – A Compassionate Communication Workbook for Couples, go to

http://www.magicrelationship.net/ebook

The content is great – the recording quiet, much to my disappointment, isn’t perfect…

To get a copy of the STUDY-GUIDE for this call – go to:

http://www.magicrelationship.net/study

Listen, discover and enjoy,

Paul Sterling

PS  Please leave your comments and feedback below

PPS.       ABOUT THE SPEAKER:
Paul Sterling is a relationship coach, a public speaker
and the author several eBooks on relationship communication,
including “STOP… In The Name Of Love” “The 5
Relationship-Wrecking Communication Mistakes” and “The 4
Steps to Instant Intimacy and Understanding”

OTHER LINKS: To discover more about the speaker and
communication secrets, check out these videos:

http://www.magicrelationship.net/freevideos

For info on my new ebook:

http://www.magicrelationship.net/ebook-new.htm

Bridging The Gap Between Us - relationship video series

You Already Know That When Your Communication Starts Breaking Down – So Does Your Relationship…

What most couples don’t know… is how to STOP this painful downward spiral and bring back the love, understanding, intimacy and romance that they desire before it’s too late!”

… in this series of videos you will discover relationship tips, tools and techniques.

Click here to watch the first video now…

http://www.magicrelationship.net/freevideos

with passion, purpose and possiblity,

Paul Sterling
your relationship coach

The 5 Destructive Communication Habits That Destroy Relationships.

Last week I did a one hour, interactive conference call/teleseminar covering what these 5 habits are… and how to change them before they destroy your relationship.

It was a great call, but do to the short notice, a lot of people missed and emailed asking for the recording of this call…

Ask and it is yours… at least some of the time.

With Passion, Purpose and Possibility,

Paul Sterling

PS if you want to get the ebook and bonus mp3 intereveiws
http://www.magicrelationship.net/ebook-new.htm

Here is the call

I’m writing this, looking out over three hammocks, and the beautiful blue ocean. Part of the reason I’m writing this long-winded post, is to let you know why I haven’t finished updating the last three chapters of the e-book… I promise to do it soon.

Until then, here’s a quick tour of the beautiful little town Yelapa, on the west coast of Mexico, just south of Puerto Vallarta.

The main street, which isn’t really a street at all, more like a weaving path, sometimes with concrete and cobblestones, sometimes just mud and stones, is truly the main and only thoroughfare through town.

At its widest spots, you can use a four-wheel-drive ATV, something that sort of like a heavy-duty go-cart, but the most common travel is by foot or by burro. The burros seem to do most of the heavy lifting and transporting through town and up the narrow mountain trails… Yelapa is small it’s more like a village… not really sure what to call it.

Anyway, I’m sure that after a couple of weeks you get to know everybody, and everybody, for better or for worse gets to know you, because you pass them daily on the main street – path – trail… and you’re on foot.

I definitely enjoy the feel. The 15 minute walk to town, often takes two or three times as long because of the conversations you have the people along the way.

Yesterday we took a two hour trip (I’m here with my brother and mother… and soon my girlfriend will be flying in to join us) up the narrow jungle trail into the local rainforest to see some wonderful waterfalls.

About a half an hour out of town, we came across something that best could be called the shack. There was as many planks missing from the side of the building, as were in place. It truly looked like one strong wind would blow the whole thing over… and yet there in the middle of nowhere was the satellite dish. Ah yes, modern technology.

As we waalked deeper into the rain forest, it became very clear why it was called the RAIN forest… there was several times we retreated under the shelter of very large and twisting trees, staying relatively dry in the downpours.

We are here in February, which I’m guaranteed by the locals is the dry season, and so far. It’s rained almost every day so far… including one major tropical storm, which blew rain 20 feet into the living room, soaking furniture, beds, pretty much everything.

Oh yeah, there are no windows, and only very limited walls as protection against the storm… so when the winds started howling, it blew in one side out of house and out the other.

I don’t have the wrong about any of this, I’m not complaining… so far it’s felt like a grand adventure.

And it keeps getting better, after returning from the rain forest, we decide to go for a swim in the ocean. I was standing about knee deep in the gentle surf, when I looked down and noticed something undulating in the ways. As I watched more closely, I realized it was actually swimming. Than there was two of them, than three, than four…

Turns out that these creatures were a relative of moray eels, called Tiger Reef Eels. They look like and swimming snake, are about a foot and a half long and have beautiful pattern of black-and-white, but i must say, I was a little intimidating by the idea of swimming with them, since it first, I thought they might be sea snakes.

Well after my non-swim with the eels. I decided to keep my commit and finish working on my e-book – STOP… In The Name of Love. This meant dealing with the local technology problems.

which, by the way, wasn’t doing so well since the rain took down the local wireless Internet connection… for about a day and a half… when they finally got that fixed.

Caroline, who manages the place we’re staying, let me know that I better come check my e-mails while had a chance.

I headed over to the main house where everything’s set up, got my laptop computer going and found out that I have about 473 e-mails in my inbox that wanted to my attention… before I could do anything about it, we had a electrical blackout.

That lasted the next three hours. So by the time we got electricity again I was in the middle of a card game… and so I’ve put off checking my e-mail until this morning.

Oh yeah, at that point there over 610 that need my attention… and I’m thinking of heading off to town for breakfast… instead.

I think this is probably the longest excuse letter I’ve ever written so far… Welcome to Mexico.

With passion, purpose and possibility,

Paul Sterling
Your Relationship Coach

PS. If you haven’t already signed up to get one of my ebooks as gift (but only until Valentines Day) just click here. http://www.magicrelationship.net/valentine

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thanks for your e-mails offering support and requesting an update on the progress of the e-book.

Stop… In The Name Of Love – How to Stop the Five Destructive Communication Habits That May Be Destroying Your Loving Relationship

well here it is – at about 1:00 last night when i got because the dog had an accident…

(yeah, I know tmi)

anyway, I couldn’t go back to sleep so instead of laying in bed – tossing and turning – i finished chapter #3

the chapter on the destructive habit called;  STORYTELLING… That’s my story and I’m sticking to it…

so for your reference here is a reader’s digest form of the Table Of Contents…
(don’t worry – there is much more in the book – this is just to give you a sneak
peak)

• The 5 Communication Habits Intro
  The ‘Real Reason’ most relationships end, fail…
  hint- it’s not what you think

• Habit 1) CASE-BUILDING… I’m Right – You’re Wrong…
  Anything  you say can and will… be used against you…

  How labeling will destroy your relationship
  A simple way to re-connect with your lover

• Habit 2) STORYTELLING… That’s my story and I’m sticking to it… Asking for what you want so you they want to give it
  How your stories rob you of intimacy and love.
  Why people’s stories are more important than reality
  How the stories you tell… can make your life Hell – or Heaven

• Habit 3) MESSAGE ASSUMING…  When Mind Reading Goes Bad… The two types of messages assuming
  What causes misunderstandings and how to avoid them
  The trick the pizza guy knows, that could save your relationship
  The one question that stops message assuming in its tracks

• Habit 4) CUP STUFFING… The Straw That Broke the Relationships Back… When to never ask for what you want… and why
  One simple question that will let you know exactly what to give your lover

• Habit 5) The FATAL F’s… Let Me Tell You What To Do… A common mistake that will repel your partner and erode trust
  Secret recipe for juicy intimacy and rebuilding trust
• and much, much more…

When you are done reading this eBook, you will understand where most misunderstandings, conflicts, upsets and arguments come from… and more importantly, what to do about it

With passion, purpose and possibility,

Paul Sterling

Your Relationship Coach

PS. if you haven’t already reserved your FREE COPY, do it now, before Valentines Day (after that it’s $47.95) -

… just go to http://www.magicrelationship.net/valentine

Stop... In The Name of Love -this is just few of the updates

Hey Everyone…

thanks for all your support and ideas for the new eBook.

to make it easier for everyone to participate, could you leave you feedback and comments below.

with passion, purpose and possibility,

Paul Sterling
your relationship coach

PS. I have included a sneak peek of some
of the changes going into this new eBook.

Once you’ve had a chance to read your copy,
please come back here and leave your comments,
suggestions and feedback below.

Holidays can be filled with the stress of unexpressed expectations… creating all sorts of hazardous emotional ‘mind-fields’ and communication pit-falls.

As a relationship communication coach, I understand – it’s not your fault if you can’t read your lover’s mind… but there is something you can do about it – help is on the way!

… as you may have heard, I’ve shut myself away up here in my cabin in the Rocky Mountains to meet my deadline:

… rewrite and update my eBook on relationship communication so it can be released before Valentines Day!

Somewhere in the mix of too much coffee, the exhilarating momentum of getting it done & a feeling of overwhelm from the piles of notes, changes & reminders to self to breath/eat/stretch…

a totally crazy idea hit me…

… why not give away a 1,000 copies of my new eBook – as a totally free gift – to my friends and family before Valentines Day.

Okay now, I got to get back to editing so if you want to get the full story (and the reason I’m doing this)…

just click on this link to get the skinny & reserve yourself a copy today!

http://www.magicrelationship.net/valentine

With passion, purpose and possibility,

Paul Sterling
Your Relationship Coach

…the clock is ticking! So just do some clicking:

http://www.magicrelationship.net/valentine

I started the hot water running. After only a few minutes the water
started backing up and filling the tub.

Damn, the drainpipe had frozen again… One of the frustrating
challenges of living in the cold (but beautiful) mountains of
Colorado.

As I got bundled up so I could head outdoors and defrost the
drainpipe… again… I’ve flashed on what I should’ve done.

Prevention is so simple.  When the temperatures are get into the
teens outside all I need to do is run some hot water through the
pipes if each evening, before going to bed… avoiding frozen pipes and
hours of work defrosting them.

What does any of this have to do with your relationship?

Great question… read on and find out.

So… as I headed out the door, mumbling under my breath and wishing
I had just spent a few minutes in keeping the pipe thawed, I realize
how much this is like a relationship.

A few minutes of prevention… of gratitude… can keep a small issue
from becoming a huge issue… and can prevent the freezing of the
emotional pipes between you and your lover.

Very often, clients wait the last minute to come to me… after the
pipes are frozen solid … and love doesn’t even have a chance of
flowing at between them. At this point, it would take a blow torch to
defrost their pipes and solve their relationship problems… but
luckily it’s not impossible.

So here’s my quick ‘Gratitude Exercise’.

Do this exercise at least once a week, especially when it’s cold
outside so you can keep your relationship communication pipes thawed
and the love flowing.

Simply sit down with your lover, decide who’s going to go first,
and then who ever goes first is going to tell their partner three
things they are grateful for/what they appreciate about their lover.

Here’s an example: Joe and Sarah are having a tough day, in fact,
it’s tempting just to turn on the TV and turn off any chance of
connection, understanding and intimacy that night.

But Sarah decides she wants more from their relationship… and is
willing to take the lead to get it… she grabs Joe by the hand and
leads him to the couch, saying “I know… let’s try that ‘Gratitude
Exercise’…  and I’ll even go first.”

Reluctantly, Joe settles into the couch next to her. His face looks
doubtful, but the truth is, he is actually intrigued by the idea and
skeptically hopeful about the outcome.

After all, she’s about to tell him what she appreciates about him,
rather than lecturing him on what he’s done wrong and how he should
change. Now that’s a relief.

Sarah is a little uncomfortable to start with but fires away “Joe,
you know, last week, when you took the kids camping and fishing with
you… and had to miss your bowling night to do it… They were so happy
and excited when they got home, filled with stories of their great
adventure… I was so proud of you as my lover and their father. It
really touched my heart!”

She then moves on to the second one. “Honey, I’m afraid I haven’t
been thanking you for making the bed in the morning while I’m rushing
to get the kids to school and make breakfast. You have no idea how
that simple act makes me feel so loved and supported.  Thank you!”

At this point, she can see the Joe is visibly moved and touched by
these first two statements of gratitude… and she can see he’s even
looking forward to more…

Inspired, she says makes her final statement. “I know this is going
to sound kind of funny, but I’d totally appreciate that you work out
at the gym several times a week. I love it that my girlfriends are
envious about how good you look.”

After sitting there and holding hands for a few minutes, they
switch and it’s Joe’s turn. When they were done, the pipes were
thawed and love is flowing through them easily.
Okay, now it’s your turn.
Grab your lover by the hand sit them down on the couch and give it
a try.  Don’t worry about getting it right, JUST DO IT…

With passion, purpose and possibility,

Paul Sterling
Your relationship coach

P.S. I’m looking forward your feedback. Give it a shot and than
leave a comment below. Until next time…

PPS. make sure to check out my ebook on relationship
communication at: http://www.magicrelationship.net/ebook